Can't keep a complainer down

Back by popular demand. You missed me - didn't you?

You know what really grinds my gears? Today is mother's day and I'm not a mom - and that's fine and all, I'm waiting till I'm good and tired of not having responsibilities, cause nothing ruins a perfectly delicious plate of ihop cheesecake pancakes quicker than a three-year-old throwing yogurt - but it got me to thinking. I haven't properly celebrated me in at least two months or more. My three weddings are but a distant memory now that spring has sprung, all the left-over valentine's day candy has that weird, white film over it (who am I kidding, there's no left-over valentine's day candy, and even if there were and it had white film, that wouldn't stop me from eating it, but still) and all I have left of my 3rd 29th birthday party are some embarrassing pictures to untag on Facebook.

This is the longest I've gone without someone sending me a card in like a year and it honestly pains me. No one told me today how special I am, how pretty I look or gave me anything to unwrap. Yuck right?! I'm not that cool with the lack of admiration and adoration I'm feeling.

And you know what, I won't have a me celebration for months to come. Like a million people have birthdays between now and my next one including Ette 2, my mom (and it's a big one), my husband, my niece, the new kid, my uncle and brother-in-law, blech. I guess I'm just supposed to be excited for all you guys huh? Well I'm not. I got good and used to having parties for myself and you all showing up and being excited and lifting me up on chairs and stuff. Argh it's killing me to recall it all now since it's been so freaking long since it's happened. Seriously, someone call my bridesmaids and have them organize some shit. They were all thrilled to help out during wedding and bachelorette party planning, I'm sure they wouldn't mind chipping in again. Doesn't have to be anything huge. How about just the core group of 20-25 meet at a restaurant or better yet take a back-room in some cool, new loungey bar, get a couple balloons and some cupcakes with my picture digitally printed on them. Is that too much to ask? And everyone can you all wear black and then I'll wear red so I really stand out and let's have karaoke there, but I'll do like every other song. Oh actually, let's do this, if someone else wants to sing we'll find a duet - that would be good. And someone remember to bring your camera and really try to upload the photos to send to me the next day. I hate waiting to get pics from my parties.

Whew, I actually feel better just knowing now that this is in the works. Thats guys, you're the best and I appreciate it. See you soon.

Remember, you guys wear black.