Swim class part Ew

Went to baby swim again today, but this time I was just a bystander which gave me a lot of observation time.  Here's what I discovered:

• 30-something married jewish guys are not hot
  
• Their wives are all skinny bitches
  
• Public pools are gross
  

I'll explain...

On the guys (For the record this does not apply to Bro-In-Law.  I do not see him without a shirt on, whenever he disrobes for a swimming activity, my eyes instantly avert themselves to other points of interest, as such I have no clue what he looks like sans clothes which is fine for me.)  But all the other schlubs at the pool were fair game and man it wasn't a fun game for me.  About seven dudes in their swim trunks splashed in the baby pool with their little ones (just realized that's a pub, so I'll leave it in which makes me feel clever so I'll leave it in).  If they weren't hairy backed and bald-headed, they were 12-year-old boy skinny and white as a sheet of paper.  What happens to these guys after I dos and babies?  I remember you guys in college, you were all kinda hot, tan, strong, at least toned looking, certainly more hair was in the appropriate places.  Now not so much.  Unless this is not the type of guy I hung with.  These were probably the nerdy guys who actually visited the library in school and became important richy riches.  Which probably explains their wives.  

Every single one of them was a size zero, brunette, in leggings and with a scowl on her face.  From far away, you'd think they were hot I guess, but get up close and the "annoying" just radiates off of them.  The sound of their voices must make the hair literally fall off their husbands heads and get stuck on his back and he's too defeated from her constant complaints to try to brush them off.  And what's with wearing leggings as actual pants?!  This is my latest peeve.  Fine under a dress, or over sized tunic, I'll even accept it at the gym.  Not fine as outerwear in public.  I can see your whole ass, I know some would argue, but it's not what I'm looking for at kiddie swim.  

So I spent a lot of time looking in the other direction, and over there were teenage swimmers competing in a meet.  All these skinny (yet toned) young swimmers with their Michael Phelps-esc swim pants barely hovering above their pelvis bone.  I felt like a perv, had to look away again.  I watched the kids for a while, they were semi-cute, but most just looked sort of shocked and wet.  Then I noticed one unattended tot spitting into the side of the pool.  And I imagined if spitting is happening in that pool, other, likely less sanitary bodily functions must be happening. 

The whole experience is unpleasant.  I hope Angle Baby is getting a lot out of it.  And next weekend, I'll resume normal sunday activities.  Chillaxing.