I don't understand it. I can not stop drooling when I see it. The new Dyson, with its ball midriff, and roll-around-the-corners gracefully moves, I want to date one - they are just so...sexy. Housewife stereotypes and misogyny be damned.
This thing makes me want to vacuum. It makes me want to get the vacuum in corners and really whisk out all that archaic dog hair that's been nesting. I want to swish around my house, curving in and out like a Miata on the PCH, just sweeping and swooshing and scooping up whatever is in my path, sucking it into my bagless, dustless, colorful wundermachine.
I think that Dyson could single-handedly fix the economy, and here's why:
If every household had a Dyson vacuum, houses would consistently be cleaner. That's a fact. And cleaner houses means happier homeowners and inhabitants. And happier homeowners and inhabitants means better relationships, which means more sexy time, which means more "appreciation" moments reciprocated, which of course involve things like flowers, jewelry, chocolate, shoes...bags. And thus, husbands will start spending money on their wives, the people who deserve it most, and give the economy the jolt it needs.
So if you're smart, you'll heed my advice and buy stock in Dyson, Godiva and 1800Flowers. This is the formula to our salvation, people.
I gotta run, I'm cleaning the vacuum brush on my Dyson...I want to keep 'er looking young, and sexy...and in good shape, in case I have to sell it in a pinch.
This thing makes me want to vacuum. It makes me want to get the vacuum in corners and really whisk out all that archaic dog hair that's been nesting. I want to swish around my house, curving in and out like a Miata on the PCH, just sweeping and swooshing and scooping up whatever is in my path, sucking it into my bagless, dustless, colorful wundermachine.
I think that Dyson could single-handedly fix the economy, and here's why:
If every household had a Dyson vacuum, houses would consistently be cleaner. That's a fact. And cleaner houses means happier homeowners and inhabitants. And happier homeowners and inhabitants means better relationships, which means more sexy time, which means more "appreciation" moments reciprocated, which of course involve things like flowers, jewelry, chocolate, shoes...bags. And thus, husbands will start spending money on their wives, the people who deserve it most, and give the economy the jolt it needs.
So if you're smart, you'll heed my advice and buy stock in Dyson, Godiva and 1800Flowers. This is the formula to our salvation, people.
I gotta run, I'm cleaning the vacuum brush on my Dyson...I want to keep 'er looking young, and sexy...and in good shape, in case I have to sell it in a pinch.
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