Monday, November 12, 2007

SHOPPING

I'm very excited to present to you our first guest-ette posting - and from a male perspective. Note the anger and hostility that is in stark contrast to generally light and fluffy tone of the female post. We're hoping this helps us attract a whole new readership of opposite sex. Enjoy guys - this is from Brette1.


Shopping is fun, right ladies? You get to go out, spend time with friends, buy stuff you want/need, come home with a new sweater dress or two. Shopping has it all...unless you're the unfortunate testicle laden sucker (henceforth referred to as "younger brother") getting duped into "joining the fun". How do you get duped, you ask? Well I needn't tell you how crafty the (un)fairer sex is, but here are a few of their craftier craftations:

1) You foolishly believe that when they say "Hey younger brother, let's go shopping, I'll buy you stuff" that you'll actually get rewarded for you accompaniment. Unfortunately, I didn't really find anything I wanted at Banana Republic for Women.

2) You foolishly believe that when they say "Hey younger brother, let's go get something to eat" that you'll actually be going to some place that sells food, or at least delicious candy...not realizing that the only treat these pigs want to ingest are the newest fashions at some clothes store (a store that incidentally has an entire SECTION dedicated to bureau knobs!!! WHO NEEDS THAT MANY BUREAU KNOBS!!!)

3) You foolishly believe that when they say "Hey younger brother, our mutual father just got into a horrible accident and is trapped in his car in an embankment on the side of the highway!" that you'll be rushing to your dad's aide...instead of rushing to the nearest department store. She claimed she said "Bloomingdale's" all along, but who takes the "Jaws of Life" with her to shop at Bloomingdale's, huh?!

Fortunately for me I've learned their demon trickery, albeit the hard way. I just hope my fellow younger brothers, boyfriends, husbands, and baby daddies can learn from this, my most pressing Kvetch. I have to go now, ette1 is taking me to some war memorabilia store called "Old Navy"...I guess there's hope for her after all.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

better you than me, at least when i am asked to go shopping, i have to provide my credit card... mom-ette1