Big Bust

Pants and I had no plans this weekend, so we figured we should head down to the Belmont Stakes.  It's like I can't freaking escape from sports , I hope he appreciates sporty I am.  So we hop on the LIRR and the ride is a breeze, can't wait to get there and see history in action since Big Brown is a sure thing to take the Triple Crown.  So we arrive around 3 and head up in a hurry to put our money down - 2/5 odds so we won't make a lot but whatever it's free money, everyone says he's going to win.  I even buy a couple $2 tickets for a few people just to save because the first Triple Crown in 30 years is sure to be worth something.  Of course almost instantly as we enter the betting building we are overcome with heat.  No air-conditioning, not a fan in sight, but what we do see are hoards of sweaty drunk people.  So we wait in a 15 minute long line to get some water and beers, $30 later we take a stroll around.  For some inexplicable reason the floors are all wet and muddy and there is no air circulating in this place. We go outside to scope a spot to watch the race right by the post, we figure there will be plenty of room when we come back so we stroll around some more.  Surprisingly there's nothing to do there but bet on horses and drink beer, Pants decides he needs more cash so we wait in another line and I'm not kidding it was 45 minutes to the front - ridiculous.  I won't even start on the line for the women's room, I held it all day and we heard the men's room broke down, so guys were lining up to piss in a trash can  - no joke, see above.  Finally we're about an hour away from the big race so we head back outside and sneak up as far in the front as we can without being blinded by the sun.  I can't see the track of course since I'm like 5 foot nothing but I can see the one video screen they have.  Takes forever for the race to  start so you have a lot of time to explore your surroundings, I was surrounded by B.O.  Insane BO, not just limited to one guy next to me, it was everybody, girl BO, boy BO, black BO, white BO... all sorts or hideous smells mixing together and wafting up to my nostrils.  Finally we hear the horn sound and they are off, at this point everyone in front of me stands up so now my little view of the screen is gone and I just have to listen to the crowd to find out what's happening.  At least he'll win and I get money I think, that will make up for all the sweating and smelling.  But no, the freaking horse that had the worst odds takes the prize and Big Brown comes in dead last.  The masses all groan and turn to the exit, that's when the real shit starts.  We get pinned up in a line of thousands of people trying to exit this place.  We were literally trapped between bodies and people were getting trampled.  No one was protected, old men and women with walkers be dammed, it was every drunk ass for himself while a line of cops just stood around and watched the whole thing.  Half the crowd was taunting the cops for doing nothing while people were climbing over fences and falling off railings.  It took a full hour just to exit.  We finally got on a train and made it back to the city before darkness fell.  So in the end, our horse didn't win, we didn't make money, we didn't see history and we barely made it out alive.  I am so freaking done with sports. Nothing good can come of it.