Birthday parties for babies

It’s a whole new world once you grow out of keggers for your friends and start attending birthday parties for kids turning 1. Angel Baby is a year old now and we celebrated this weekend with a party and baby naming in her honor. Here are the lowlights.

• You get all excited for the first time a kid is going to eat cake. For the first year it’s basically bottles and stewed peas, so by the time the first birthday comes around you are excited to share your deep love of sweets. But of course since it’s an unfamiliar flavor the kid just makes a yucky face and then whines because they have frosting on their hands – total letdown, oh well, more cake for me.

• For the occasion you buy baby an adorable little pink dress with white polka dots, but baby gets her hands on a bottle of water and proceeds to spill the entire thing down the front of her dress – thus ruining birthday photos in cute dress.

• No alcohol at baby parties – but plenty of salads with mayo.

• When surrounded by 30 strangers, baby refuses to do all the cute baby tricks you taught her all year, like saying “hi,” and waving and doing the “so big” arm thing.

• Gift you and Pants carefully chose at FAO Schwarz goes completely unnoticed as baby tries to eat wrapping paper.