Does it bother you that Pam Anderson is filing for annulment?

Because it bothers me.

Getting a marriage annulled basically means it never happened. It’s null, it didn’t exist. I understand why we allow for that rule, like if some dude tricked me into marrying him and it turned out he was actually a woman – then it makes sense to annul that shit. I don’t want a divorce on my record for something like that. But that bitch knew what she was getting into when she married Paris’ sex tape guy. He isn’t secretly a woman – we saw the tape! I’m sure she, along with every other human being with a TV, knew that maybe this “marriage” wasn’t the most well-thought-out idea in the world. Somewhere deep in her peroxided brain, she had an inkling that they may not be life partners. So no, she doesn’t get to just have the thing deleted from existence. She should have a long, drawn out, miserable divorce during which all kinds of creepy tip bits about their lives become public and she loses millions in a settlement – since obviously there was no pre-nup. If I ever become president (I’m not that far off since I’m a veep) then I will enact a no annulment rule for famous people. Famous people you are henceforth warned. You are famous – your marriage has a really really tiny, little, basically nothing chance of being successful – so please think long and hard before you say those vows. Consider for yourself – is this someone I may potentially want to go through a long painful divorce with? If yes, fine than marry – because there will be no more get out of jail (jail = marriage) free cards anymore – unless of course the person you married turns out to be a woman.