C'est Duckie

So yours truly and my girlfriend (she's not an Ette, although she certainly is quite bitchy...instead we have coined her a "Spice" because, well, she's spicy) decided to plan a surprise outing for husbandette and fiance-ette because life in the "fast lane" of marriage and suburbia certainly has us wrapped up and sometimes we forget to make time for ourselves. I mean, sometimes we forget to have a social life. Yes, it's true. Personally, there is nothing I would rather do than sit with an Entennmann's Dutch Coffee Cake and my DVR wearing my comfy clothes and not a care in the world on a Friday night, but sometimes we have to make compromises, and pretend to still be interested in the outside world. And culture.

SO...we decided on dinner and a show; C'est Duckie, a Parisian cabaret-style production was in its last two days of running in NY and so I snatched up four tickets for the 10:30 Friday showing. What could make us ladies look more cool, confident and sexy than taking our mens to a burlesque-esque show on the Lower East Side? After feeding them with steaks and scotch to boot?? We were definitely winning brownie points with our dudes for this one.

Dinner commenced at 8:30 at THOR (cleverly named the acronym of it's hotel space; The Hotel on Rivington). Not much to note on here short of the decor which is whimsically dark (in a goth way; not a creative lighting way) and the service (which is poor at best) and I guess a footnote on the culinary experience which was unmemorable (except for the bill, which was huge, so I will definitely remember that). Anyway, a good time was had by all, and our carnivorous appetites were sated so that's good...

On to the show...we were ushered to our table, where we were seated with 6 other revelers ready for a sexy Parisian showdown. We wanted some T&A, if you know what I mean. Upon taking our seats we were given a menu and Duckie dollars to spend ordering our entertainment for the evening. The menu was brash enough; entrees such as "Nacho Snatcho" and "Glockenspiel High Leg Kick" were being served, so we were psyched; our palates ready for excitement. The cast, a group of three women and two men sauntered on stage in full nude bodysuits that looked like they had been used and abused; ill-fitting and torn, they weren't the sexiest of costumes, but nonetheless, we had high hopes. Our table chose Nacho Snatcho, Art Class, Lionel Richie's Opera and the Leg Kick. Let's just say, eating nachos from between a stranger's toes and dipping it in salsa set on her crotch whilst she stands on her head on your tabletop is certainly entertaining, albeit a little unsanitary. A geeky guy stringing Lionel Richie lyrics together while squirting his bare puny chest with red dye, however, not so much.

All in all, we enjoyed the brash comedy of C'est Duckie. We left with illicit portraits we had drawn of a gender-confused "member" of the cast and our dignity still in tact; which was what we were hoping to have left at the table. The best part of the evening? Celebrity sighting Seth Meyers of SNL sitting at the table next to us. He was the most interesting part of the evening, as we all tried our hand as the SNL announcer dude, thoroughly annoying our "too cool for school" table mates.

Bottom line - we should have taken the boys to Lucky Chengs. We would have had a lot more illicit fun and everybody knows gay karaoke/cabaret clubs are where it's at.

Update: Yes, readerettes, you found an error in my posting. It is Seth Meyers. Not Seth Cohen of the late "The O.C." fame. I believe I must have been having flashbacks to my wanton crush on Adam Brody. Apologies all around. Our kvetchette fact-checker has been fired.