Why Ette2 is a stellar writer candidate for grandparents.com:
1) Because she is a sassy, smart writer, dangit. She has spent eight long years using her written word to influence people in all sorts of ways – via product pitching, celebrity-teasing, marketing mumbo-jumbo, tugging at the emotional heart strings, and all that falls in between.
2) Because ette2 (hearts) grandparents. She personally has two grandmama’s and one nana-in-law who believe that she is the coolest thing since sliced challah and are looking for another reason to be proud of her (to add to the very long and laminated list they currently share with their gal pals on bridge-and-poker night).
3) Because she likes happy people, and everyone knows grandparents are the happiest people on earth. Talk about a positive audience! She’s used to writing for jaded, bitter and aggressive 18-36 year old female consumers. What a nice change of pace Bubby and Zayde would be!
4) Because it would give her the perfect excuse to seek the best recipe on earth for Grandma’s Chicken Soup. She believes this is surely a contest in the making…
5) Because she rocks. Seriously. Not only is she a cool person to be around, but she is probably the best spell-checking machine and proofreader that has ever walked the street. She can spot a misspelling 18 1/2 city blocks away and will ensure grandparents.com passes the error-proof-test (and we don’t mean the kind you pee on).
6) Because she needs to work or her husband is going to throw her out on her head, which will leave no opportunity to have children of their very own, thus rendering their own parents grandchild-less. This would be devastating for all involved. Surely you understand her predicament.
Have your people call her people. Let’s brighten everyone’s day, why don’t we?
1) Because she is a sassy, smart writer, dangit. She has spent eight long years using her written word to influence people in all sorts of ways – via product pitching, celebrity-teasing, marketing mumbo-jumbo, tugging at the emotional heart strings, and all that falls in between.
2) Because ette2 (hearts) grandparents. She personally has two grandmama’s and one nana-in-law who believe that she is the coolest thing since sliced challah and are looking for another reason to be proud of her (to add to the very long and laminated list they currently share with their gal pals on bridge-and-poker night).
3) Because she likes happy people, and everyone knows grandparents are the happiest people on earth. Talk about a positive audience! She’s used to writing for jaded, bitter and aggressive 18-36 year old female consumers. What a nice change of pace Bubby and Zayde would be!
4) Because it would give her the perfect excuse to seek the best recipe on earth for Grandma’s Chicken Soup. She believes this is surely a contest in the making…
5) Because she rocks. Seriously. Not only is she a cool person to be around, but she is probably the best spell-checking machine and proofreader that has ever walked the street. She can spot a misspelling 18 1/2 city blocks away and will ensure grandparents.com passes the error-proof-test (and we don’t mean the kind you pee on).
6) Because she needs to work or her husband is going to throw her out on her head, which will leave no opportunity to have children of their very own, thus rendering their own parents grandchild-less. This would be devastating for all involved. Surely you understand her predicament.
Have your people call her people. Let’s brighten everyone’s day, why don’t we?
1 comment:
Wives (and women generally) should be seen earning large paychecks and never heard from... ever.
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